Communication In Childbirth

The words/language that we use have power. This is true in daily life, but it is especially important to remember in the midst of labor and childbirth. One of the activities I do with clients during my private childbirth education classes is called the Birth Partner Communication Tool. For birthing folks with partners, each person is given an identical handout with a list of words they can circle that they associate with labor and birth and what they think their partner would circle. We discuss what words each person associates with this life transformation experience and why and we do the same with the words they chose for their partner.

In all of my years of doing this exercise, there have only been two couples who made things awkward when they shared their answers! It quickly became clear to me that they hadn’t discussed much about childbirth and were coming to the experience from very different backgrounds and with different expectations. Those two couples aside though, this tool has been really helpful for my clients to start a dialogue about what they think of when they think of birth and to share the emotions, biases, etc. that are often attached to those words.

How would you describe birth? Do you think it’s weird, gross, and/or a highly medical event? Do you think it’s safe, natural, and/or a meaningful rite of passage? Have you given much thought to how powerful the words are that we use around labor and birth? Is this something that was modeled for you as you grew up or is it something you’re learning now? I’d love to hear from you in the comments!